For some reason I am always to blame for what goes wrong. Up to a point I am willing to be the fall guy for all this. I'd like to reveal all his faults but I have agreed to keep them secret so as not to hurt the beautiful ones. Still, the beautiful ones consistently blaming me is wearing me down.
There seems to be a fine line between what I am willing to take as the fall guy for ending this marriage and my rights as a personal human being. I made mistakes. Some I will regret forever because they have changed how my beautiful ones look at me. I can only move forward and hope that my love for them will conquer any fear or misunderstanding.
Somewhere along the way I have lost my way. There was a time when I was sure that I knew it all about who to love and how to love. Now I'm pretty sure that all I know could be represented by the numerical equivalent of zero. That's a pretty scary place to be when I know there are younger people who have a better grasp on this than I do. I forgot about loyalty and standing by someone. We forgot.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Monday, June 8, 2009
First Post
The first words are always the most difficult. How can I say anything that has not already been said about this journey back to singlehood? I never thought at this point in my life I would be facing these difficult decisions. The hardest part of it all for me is that others have to bear this with me. They don't deserve to have that hurt. I'm counting on the love I have for my beautiful ones, that it will sustain them and they will come to know...it won't change.
We are waiting for my attorney to draw up the separation agreement. He has no attorney. He can, he should, but he doesn't and he won't because he's a bit lazy. Although we have decided to keep this separation out of uglyland, this may be the only place where I do vent about his flaws. He's free to set up a blog and vent about mine although I will probably admit to one or two myself.
It's morning..I need to get ready to work and instead I set up this blog. My head is not in work lately.....not at all. I can't wait to be on vacation soon.
We are waiting for my attorney to draw up the separation agreement. He has no attorney. He can, he should, but he doesn't and he won't because he's a bit lazy. Although we have decided to keep this separation out of uglyland, this may be the only place where I do vent about his flaws. He's free to set up a blog and vent about mine although I will probably admit to one or two myself.
It's morning..I need to get ready to work and instead I set up this blog. My head is not in work lately.....not at all. I can't wait to be on vacation soon.
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